You Do You, Boo (A Discussion About Internal Motivation)

Last year, I did a small series of blog posts in which I discussed the variety of ways to motivate yourself externally. It was a nice little series. I enjoyed writing it. But what happens when all those frills stop working?

Remember....who....you are....

(Inserting gifs in here because it's 2016 and that's the Thing To Do.)

The most common advice I hear from anyone, in terms of work and career, is to do what you love. A no-brainer, right? It would seem so; hell, I preach that advice every day. But what happens when you don't even know what that means anymore? What happens when you sit down one day, doing The Thing You Love, only to start thinking that you maybe don't love it as much as you thought?

You have a freak out, for starters. You start to panic a bit. You start to question whether you're on the right path, whether this thing truly is The Thing You Love. Then you bury your troubles under hours and hours of Sims and try not to think about it.

(Not like I would know or anything....)

What makes something The Thing You Love? What magical quality does it posess that allows it to turn from just a hobby into...more? It's not an easy thing to pinpoint, really, because there's not just one way for it to get to that point. We all live different lives, we all choose to put our passion in different things for different reasons. There's no road map to figure out what The Thing You Love should really be. 

All you can really do...is do you. You do you, boo!

I don't know when I started saying this. Probably as a joke, to be honest--something to say indifferently, as a go-ahead to a suggestion, when the process doesn't affect the outcome, or the outcome doesn't affect me at all. "Go for it--you do you, Boo."

Then, last month, a friend of mine uploaded a post on her own blog, and made reference to this saying that I've suddenly adopted as my own. All at once, I realized that this saying wasn't really a joke at all--it had become advice. Real advice. Good advice, that I had never really thought to follow.

I started writing when I was around nine. It's been a part of my life for a very long time, and for all that time I never struggled with my future life plans. I wanted to do this, I was working hard for it, and I knew I was good. (Most of the time, anyway.) I always knew what I wanted to do...until suddenly, I didn't. (Y'all already know that story; it eventually lead to the creation of this blog.)

I joke about procrastination a lot. I've always done it, but over time it's gotten worse. Shouldn't this be easy? Shouldn't I have enough passion to push myself out of whatever rut I find myself in and just do it?

It wasn't that I didn't want to. I did. It's that I was lacking the energy, the time, the motivation. Every time I felt that rush, that flurry of words that poured out of me, I grabbed it desperately. I didn't want to let it go, to drift back into the void of other people's stories, all of which were starting to do nothing but remind me that mine wasn't out there.

But every time, I let go. I had to, because of responsibilities and commitments and a zillion other things that I wanted nothing to do with. I started to resent my job because of it, because I felt that every moment not spent towards The Thing I Loved was just a waste of time. I threw every creative project that wouldn't bring me a step closer to publication under the rug. 

Eventually, I threw The Thing I Loved under the rug, too. I didn't think I could do it anymore--every time I sat down to start, I got too distracted with other things. I got too frustrated with the fact that I wasn't anywhere near where I wanted to be at this point in my life--and I felt like a failure.

I stopped blogging because of it--for months.

Here's something that not everybody tells you: you're not always going to love The Thing You Love. You're not always going to love your dream job. No matter what it is, there are going to be days when you want absolutely nothing to do with it. There are going to be days when you want to do literally anything else, anything to avoid The Thing You Love. But that doesn't mean you just give it up--it doesn't mean that you've lost it, it doesn't mean that you need to throw in the towel and start looking for another way to occupy your time. That's why I wrote those initial posts, why I spent so long focusing on external motivators--because in dire times, they can save your ass. You need every ounce of inspiration you can muster.

But if you don't have the internal motivation to back it up, you're not going to get very far.

I don't know much, but this is what I do know: I love creating things. I love telling stories. I love pouring my heart and soul into something, and turning it into an experience for someone else. I love that. I always will, even sometimes I wish I could skip the hard part and skip straight to holding the finished product in my hands. The passion remains, through all the procrastination.

All you have to do is start. That's how you figure it out. You push past the hard bit, you grab hold of every ounce of motivation you can, and you use it to fuel the launch.

Because once you reach the stars, there's nothing holding you back.

You do you, guys.

- Justyne

External Motivation, Part III: The Role Model

Part 1: The Playlist
Part II: The Workspace

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My childhood hero was Sailor Moon. She was an irresponsible, clutzy crybaby on the outside, but on the inside she had a huge heart. She cared for her friends and family deeply, held more self confidence than I could ever hope to have, and believed that everyone was worth saving--everyone, even the bad guys. Her grades sucked--there's no delicate way of putting it--but every night she saved the world from whatever evil made itself known. She didn't win every time, but didn't let it stop her; she held an incredible amount of hope and faith in her heart. I wanted to both be her and be friends with her at the same time.

She was not only someone to look up to, but a friend when I felt like I had none. She and I go way back; she taught me to dream without hesitation, love without consequence, and fight for what I want out of life. The influence the character and the show had on me as a kid was a big factor in making me the person I am today.

In this case, I didn't consciously choose my role model. It's something I didn't even realized had happened until later, after a significant amount of thought and reflection. But often, a role model is someone we purposefully pick out; someone we see and say, "Hey, I wanna be like you!"

A role model can be a great source of motivation. Sometimes it's hard to mentally picture the person we want to be, and seeing this person who is excelling at all of the things we want to do gives us something solid to shoot for. In some cases, they can even give us adivce on how to get there!

But there's a danger in idolizing someone, be them fictional or real. We don't often see their failures, making it that much easier to ignore their faults and the reality of the life we want to live. When we see someone with the skills, talents, and attitudes that we lack, it's easy to feel discouraged with our own progress. It's easy to think that we'll never be as successful as they are.

It's also easy to lose yourself; when you're trying so hard to be like this other person, it's all too easy to drop the "like" and focus on being their twin. Instead of shooting for our own accomplishments in our own way, we try to do it just like they did. We drop our own opinions and interests and pick up the ones that made this one particular person so successful. We try to follow in their footsteps instead of forging our own path.

It's great to have someone to look up to, and knowing that they beat the odds to get where they are not only motivates us but inspires us to do the same. But you have to be careful that you use this role model to fuel your motivation, instead of letting the idea of them hinder it.


Who's your role model? Tell me in the comments!

Until later,

- Justyne

External Movitavtion, Part II: The Workspace

Part I: The Playlist

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If you are in pursuit of a creative career, you are going to--ideally--spend the majority of your time in some sort of designated workspace. (If not the majority, then at least a reasonably large chunk of it.) This is where you will write your first draft, your second, your third. It's where you will slave the night away, writing words that you won't even remember through the haze of sleep deprivation. This is where you will write your debut novel. This is where you will partake in a dozen NaNoWriMo's and draft a hundred query letters.

This place needs to be your home, be it your home-within-a-home or your home-away-from-home. As such, it has to be a place that not only motivates you, but inspires you to create great works of art.

You are in the midst of creating your work environment, so it is imperative that the end result is a place that you enjoy--I would even go so far as to say that it should be your FAVOURITE place!

There are two different categories that you should be thinking about whenc hoosing, designing, or redecorating your workspace--practicality and atmosphere.

Practicality is a no brainer--if you can't get any work done, it's not much of a workspace. It doesn't necessarily motivate you to get work done...it just prevents you from doing anything else.

As much as I want to skip to the atmosphere aspect of this week's topic, the practicality part is just too important to leave out. So for now, I'll leave you with a miniature preparation checklist to ensure that no distractions interfere with your motivation:

• Is there a TV in the room? Move. Now.
• Is your phone on? Turn it off and hide it in a drawer somewhere. DO NOT LET IT TEMPT YOU.
• Get off your bed. What are you even doing.
• Get off the couch, too.
• SIT AT A PROPER SURFACE IN A PROPER CHAIR
• Download this and this. And this.
• Prevent Scatterbrain Syndrom by making a To-Do list or setting a goal for your work time. SHOOT FOR THE STARS, CHILDREN.

Ok, great. All that boring stuff is out of the way--now comes the fun bit!

A couple years ago I made a Pinterest account, which was both a blessing and a curse. It was probably one of the worst things to ever happen to me, simply because it is hands down one of the most distracting websites I've ever had the misfortune of signing up for. (Yes, right up there with Tumblr.)

But at the same time, it's been great for inspiration. People pin writing tips and drawing tutorials, inspirational quotes and--probably my favourite part of this God forsaken website--home decor.

I never had a true appreciation for home decor until I found Pinterest. Bedrooms and kitchens, reading nooks and dining rooms, dens and....home offices.

The atmosphere aspect of your workspace is the most fun, the most expensive, and the trickiest. You need a workspace that is functional--organized in just the right way, with everything you need to be productive. It needs to be pretty--you're going to spend a lot of time there, so you need to want to spend a lot of time there. If it's boring or dull or ugly, you'll want to stay as far away as possible. But if it's bright and it's interesting, you'll want to spend as much time there as you can.

All the while, it can't be too distracting, because...well, you have to work sometime.

So find a space in your home, be it in your bedroom or elsewhere, and turn it into your Dream Job. Find a nice desk, as big or as small as you need, and a comfy chair. Set up your computer, or typewriter, or good 'ol fashioned pencil and notepad. Stick up a calendar with deadlines and To-Do lists, add some pretty lights and inspirational posters.

And for the love of your sanity, make sure you keep it clean.

Until later,

- Justyne

~~

Part III: The Role Model

External Motivation, Part I: The Playlist

Every morning, I optimistically set my alarm for 7 AM. Two alarms, in fact. I have been doing this for months, but I could probably count the amount of times I actually got out of bed at 7 on one hand. Sure, I was awake; I was just scrolling through social media feeds instead of doing literally anything productive at all.

My point is that sometimes (or all the time) we need a swift kick in the ass to get going. And that's okay! 

Inner motivation is infinitely more effective than outer motivation--doing something because you want to and because it falls in line with your values is a lot easier than doing it because someone else thinks you should. Even then, though, it's not always enough. Everyone falls into a slump sometimes, and the longer you mope around in the slump the harder it is to pull yourself out.

External motivation gives you that kick in the ass I mentioned earlier--it doesn't work forever, but it has the potential to work just long enough to get you the momentum you need to keep going. As long as that inner motivation exists somewhere, dormant in some dusty old corner of your mind, that little kick as the power to do a lot of good.

The good thing about this kick in the ass is that it's really not that hard to find; you can easily pull yourself away from Facebook and find it on your phone, motivating you to get out of bed. (The dealbreaker being, of course, that you want to get out of bed in the first place.) Once you're up and being the productive member of society you want to be, it's a lot easier to keep going. It's just the starting that sucks, is all.

One of my favourite methods of external motivation is music. Every few months I make a new playlist, filled with songs that I currently love and ones that really make me want to be all that I can be. I make new ones so often because my taste in music is constantly changing--songs that I was obsessed with a couple of months ago aren't quite as awesome to me anymore, and I've probably discovered a good handful of new ones to replace the old. Sometimes I'm in the mood for a different genre, a different tempo, or just something different.

But for now, these are what I've got:

- Brave by Sarah Bareilles

- Fight Song by Rachel Platten

- Something More by Sugarland

- Trip the Light by Alicia Lemke

- Praan by Garry Schyman
(Side note: If you're never seen the Where the Hell is Matt videos, watch them. Like, right now.)

- Anything by Hedley

- Best Day of My Life by American Authors

It's important that my motivational playlist is a lot different from my "Dance It Out" playlist, and yours should be, too! (All my Dance It Out playlist makes me want to do is...well, dance. And that doesn't always prove to be the most useful thing when your ideal productive state entails sitting for long periods of time.)

What are some songs that motivate you to start getting work done? Share them in the comments; I'm always looking for more!

Until later,

- Justyne

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Part II: The Workspace
Part III: The Role Model