Who Am I?

Today's and every other blog post published in November has been pre-written and scheduled for upload about a month or so in advance. The less I have to blog, the more time I have to dedicate to my NaNoWriMo project! Just like last year, you can put your attention towards the progress bar on the right to see how I'm doing.

See you all in December!

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One of my favourite things to do is complain about things that I dislike.

That sounds bad, doesn't it? I do enjoy looking on the bright side, in finding the positive aspects of any situations. But let's be real--I complain a lot.

One of the things I've been complaining about a bit recently are academic papers and professional e-mails. (Despite the fact that I've rarely had to write either since I left university.) These were always the bane of my existence because, although they do involve writing, the writing style I use for them is stiff. They're stiff and boring and, as I have put it many times before, "doesn't sound like me".

But sometimes, I catch myself approaching this blog with the same mindset as any of the more professional things I've had to do in the past. I start writing in the logical, automatic form that I mastered during my 14 years of schooling. Not because I feel like I have to--but because I want to. My life isn't fiction, so I don't write it like it is.

And that's what a blog post really is, is it? A form of an article, an essay. Non-fiction at its finest.

But these blog posts, do they sound like me? If I printed this off, unmarked, unnamed, untitled, and passed it anonymously to one of my friends...would they realize that I wrote it?

This is a question I find myself asking a lot. Do I have a writing style? Is there any unique quality about the way that I form my sentences that people would be able to identify, if they were familiar with my work? Not just story elements like romantic subplots and that One Sarcastic Character, but the very essence of my writing. The thing that would make two identical plots completely different, if they were placed in the hands of different writers.

It's one of my biggest insecurities as a writer.

And then we're back to this blog. This blog, that I love so very dearly, yet sometimes can't even bear to look at. This blog, that sometimes, on days like today, comes so easily to me...but tomorrow I could struggle with it all day and not write down a single word.

This blog is supposed to be me--me, in every form, every context. Every side of me, from my writing to my likes and dislikes and fears and dreams and whatever else I can come up with. It should be easy, shouldn't it?

I'm so sure of who I am, sometimes. But other times...I wonder.


Until later,

- Justyne