Self Discipline

If there's one thing I've learned from NaNoWriMo, it's that forcing yourself to write every day is hard. How I did it last year, I'll never know--this year, November was filled with 4-5 day writeless stretches. (Which was good for my mental sanity, but not so much for my poor word count.) Blogging every week is hard enough--which is kinda-sorta why I'm posting this at 3 am. This whole experience that I began last March just makes me wonder how the hell I've managed to win NaNoWriMo two years in a row.

It also makes me wonder why, if I can do it for a month, am I so terrible at doing it for the other 11?

I'll tell you why. Because I'm weak.

"Oh hey, I haven't played Sims in a while. Just for an hour, no big deal, then I'll write."

"Oh wow, this music is from the Tangled soundtrack! Sure haven't seen that in a while. Maybe I'll watch it."

"Frozen is only going to be in theatres for so long; I better watch it as many times as humanly possible before it leaves!"

So you see my dilemma.

It's not so much a case of procrastination, as it is of just not having any self control to sit myself down and write, with no distractions. I find quiet boring; I like to be upstairs, where everyone is talking and watching TV. I like to have background noise, like music, but it distracts me to the point that I don't get a whole lot done. I would rather write out in the open, where people can pass me by and I don't feel quite so lonely and cooped up in my bedroom.

But I have the attention span of a...thing that has a short attention span. (Shush, it's late.) I get distracted easily. And I relish in those distractions--I love noise, I love chaos. (Why do you think I work in a restaurant?) I love being flexible, and hate having to structure my writing in a strict fashion.

But if I don't, it doesn't get done.

The real problem with this is that I have absolutely no self control, at all. If something tempts me, I go for it. (Exhibit A: I watched two movies on Netflix tonight, instead of starting this blog post earlier.) (Exhibit B: I am an extremely impulsive buyer.) (Exhibit C: I'll walk to Tims in half snow / half rain because gosh darn it I want my cappuccino.)

So, if I see my Sims icon calling to me on my desktop, I will most likely click it.

If I see or hear something that reminds me of how much I love Tangled, I will most likely sit down and watch it.

If I discover that both me and a friend are free on the same night and they're willing to go see Frozen with me for the fourth time, you can bet that I will be at that movie theatre faster than you can give me the showtime. (Not that that's really necessary; I have seen it three times, after all.) (Side note: I absolutely adore this movie. A+ Disney.)

This little part of me does have its pros. It means that if I'm inspired to write, then gosh darn it, I will sit my little butt down and write. It just also means that if someone were to call me up and ask me to go out for supper, well, I would probably drop everything and go.

Such is my life.


Until later,

- Justyne


(P.S. If you're wondering what happened to Snippet Sunday...well, it's turning into less of an every-week thing, and more into a whenever-I-decide-to-do-it thing. The reason being that, after a certain point, I found I was running out of snippets to share, without spoiling too much of the story. So every now and then, I'll throw out a snippet for you guys--a larger snippet, with more content and quite possibly higher quality. You'll still get them--just not as often.)